Happy New Year !

Hey sweetiess, I haven`t got the opportunity to make a new blogpost earlier because I was gone in a vacation. How are you guys ? I hope everyone had a wonderful experience for the hollydays and I wish all your dreams come true. As for me I had a great time minus a little experience that made me feel very guilty, I didn`t killed anyone or something like this, I just had a little “affair”. I don`t know if this can be called like that, it was only a few kisses and I feel so atracted to that guy, but now I can`t stop thinking about it and I really feel like I am an aweful persone not only because of the cheatting part but because I realised I am not happy and I am living in a lie. I just hope I will deal with it without hurting anyone`s feelings and hoping my bf will not find out. I don`t dare to tell anyone close because I am affraid I will be judged so I am putting my feelings out here, maybe I will feel some kind of relief.

People are very judgemental when it comes to others and tho I am pretty judgemental sometimes I try to get ride of this habit wich is the universal flaw that makes us bad. I am human and I make mistakes, I do not try to excuse myself I just want to state my feelings.Is it bad that I want to be happy? Is it bad that I want to be in love not only to love someone? Being in love is so much different then loving and I want to feel butterflies and excitement. I am just sick of being trapped in a cage, I want more and I deserve more. So for the new year I will try to get right. I was to much time tied up to make sure everyone is feeling good, it`s time for me to be a little more selfish and to start loving myself more then others. If I don`t love myself who will truly love me as I want?

Vintage

Credits here !

Beliving in Santa !

Last Christmas I gave you my heart … but the very next day you gave it away ! This are the lyrics I am singing over and over for a week or so. I think the spirit of Winter/Christmas has enetered in my soul and since yesterday it`s snowing, everything is white and sparkly. I am such an enthusiast about winter season, of course after a month or two I am anxious for spring, I know I can`t have it all but this is like when you are little you wish to grow up fast and when you are grown up you want to be a child again.

Luckly seasons are coming and going but the years aren`t, especially on this time of the year I miss so much being a kid, with no worries about money and problems, just hanging arround and playing all day long and … beliving in Santa. When I was little I figured out myself quite quickly that Santa doesn`t exist and we were laughing about other kids that still belived in him, now I feel a bit of melancholy thinking about how great coulded be if I didn`t tryed so hard to grow.

As a 22 years old girl I choose to belive in Santa`s Spirit, because over the last years I couldn`t feel it`s Christmas, this year I want to be special, I want so badly to enjoy this hollydays. But till then I encourage all to accept a challenge, not in sl but in rl: Let`s be kidds again no mather what age you are, if it`s snowing where ever you are please take a sleigh and go to the nearest hill and just enjoy the ride of our childhood. Go outside and make a snowball or if you dare make a snowman, do anything that brings you happy memories.
I wish everyone a magical white winter and happiness !
Winter
Winter 2
For credits check here !